light in the darkness

We had the pleasure last night of a power outage from about eleventhirty till midnight. Firstly, the thunder storm that caused this outage was amazing, but secondly, I always love the memories and thoughts I have when I´m without electricity.

I was in the car with my ride home, Daniel and his wife and daughter, when it happened. We were at church for the culto do jovens (youth service). We stayed really late because we ate a butt-load of pizza afterwards. When I arrived at tia´s in the complete darkness I stumbled around, feeling for walls and countertops as I made my way to her room, to wake her up and ask about a candle. As I felt my way back into the kitchen, found the drawer with the candles, and then matches, feelings of relief come to mind. Then a match between my fingers, with a flick of my hand a spark and then light. The room is suddenly the place I recognize. I don´t need to aim in a direction and hope to not run into anything. I can see it, and avoid hurdles in my way. This reminds me of a sermon of Richard´s a while back. About our longing for the light in a dark world. About how Jesus is our light and his light is in us, we are the light. How many times have I covered up my light for the sake of fitting in or wanting to have fun? Having this realization of how lost I am without light, it doesn´t make sense to "hide it under a bushel".

I also have fun memories of every christmas eve service that i can remember. The lights are out. Richard, in my most recent memories, maybe pastor John in older ones, lights a candle. The light has come into the world... he passes the light on, it continues to grow until the sanctuary is full of light. We sing "silent night, holy night" a capella to end the service. Such wonderful memories of peace, warmth, my grandma´s lutefisk... ok, maybe that´s not that great of a memory.

The imagery of candle light, the comfort of it, the fact that for about a year i would always light a candle to meet with God makes moments of needing the light that much more meaningful. I am appreciative of these times. As i hop in bed and blow out the candle, watch the red embers slowly fade away, I say a prayer and thank God for being my light, for not needing to worry about stumbling around in darkness feeling my way through life because He is always with me. And He will never go out in the thunderstorms of life.